Valentine's Day Love

Well Valentine's Day has come and gone and we have all moved on to bigger and better things. I woke up on Valentine's Day thinking about how many people woke up that day miserable. I woke up feeling great. It was the day of love. I decided I would not allow myself to feel crappy about the day. Why should I? I'm a fabulous and amazing woman. There is no need to feel bad about myself.

I posted a few messages for the single ladies and men out there in an effort to lift people's spirits. I remember what it was like when I was single and depressed because I didn't have anyone to send me flowers. I'm in a better place in my life so I don't feel bad about it. I have spent quite a few Valentine's Days alone. I have survived everyone. I am attached this year but my boyfriend lives about three and a half hours away from me right now. Sadly, he couldn't make it home in time for the holiday so we are making plans for a rain check. My late husband and I use to do that too. Sometimes we were to busy to go out on the holiday so we would do it other days instead. I spent the day working, doing schoolwork and hanging with my baby girl. We had a good day. 

Here's what I want to say to all of you who was sad on Valentine's Day. Next year, if you find yourself alone, love on yourself. Take yourself out to dinner. Buy yourself flowers. Go get your favorite chocolate. I can tell you that I saw that most of my friends opted to stay home for the holiday. The holiday is super busy. The prices are marked up and it's a pain in the butt. Plan your day ahead of time. 

Do things that you enjoy to do that won't require you to stare at a bunch of lovers swapping spit in public. Go to a movie. Rent a movie and buy take out. My idea of a great Valentine's Day solo is a great scary movie, take out, a glass of wine and Godiva chocolate. Hell, if I'm feeling really loving to myself, I will go out and buy myself flowers and a gift. 

If you have children, especially little girls make it a date with your kids. Now here's the important part, make sure that you shower yourself along with your child/children. You want them to feel good about being single. Show them that being single is not a death sentence on Valentine's Day. If you treat yourself like the queen or king you are your kids will grow up to do the same and expect others to treat them that way also. 

Do some charity work. Nothing says love like feeding the homeless, working in a shelter animal or human. Go to a hospital and take the sick kids a single red rose. Go over to the nearest retirement home and take the elderly a little Valentine. Be creative! There are many cool things you could do for others so that their Valentine's Day is not crappy. By doing this, your day will be amazing. You won't feel crappy and neither will the people you did something nice for. 

Bottom line is this. Valentine's Day is not a holiday created by Hallmark. It is a day to celebrate love. So celebrate! Celebrate loving yourself. Celebrate loving others. Just enjoy the day and stop feeling bad that it exist while you are single. Do something loving for someone else on this day. Make someone else feel loved. Smile already! It's a great day to be alive. The world is full of promise. For all the Valentine's you've spent feeling depressed, you wasted an opportunity to love on yourself and others. We all want to have a special someone to love us. Guess what! You already do.........YOU! Don't ever forget it. 

Happy Belated Valentine's Day!!

So Exhausted.........On the Vurge of a Meltdown

Every once in a while we all feel overwhelmed. We all find ourselves up against a tremendous amount of pressure to get things done and get to places that we need to be. Tuesday and Wednesday were those days for me. I was so tired, overwhelmed and hating every damn person that crossed my path and pissed me off with their stupidity. 

Now I believe in allowing myself to feel my feelings whether they are good or bad. I believe in feeling the bad especially. The bad feelings tend to teach you things. I am one person doing the job of two as a single mom. In doing this I really don't have help. I don't have family to fall on for help. It's my path and I accept it. I don't complain it really is what it is. However, I won't sit and blow smoke up your butt and tell you that it is easy. It is no where near easy. It is extremely hard. 

Last week I had a new task put upon my plate. I have been requested to do a work study sort of program because I signed up for a program for some assistance for us. This program would be a great help to me if I were allowed to do my job as oppose to doing the program in the cookie cutter way they do things. I have asked to be allowed to do as they asked but in a way that benefits me for my business. I would essentially be killing two birds with one stone. They refuse to bend. 

I found myself on Monday night, staying up until 3:00am doing the work they asked for. The next night I was up till 1:00am. By Wednesday I was exhausted, overwhelmed and pissed off. I had homeschooling, work, homework, blog post, sewing/crocheting and they wanted me to take my work to them which meant I had to take Harmonie to daycare. Yes, in the mist of all of this for this program my child is now in daycare. She likes daycare. She is getting an opportunity to play with other kids and getting extra practice on her school work. This all sounds good right? Well not so much, when you consider that I have to drive her to daycare and pick her up. That is gas money and time taken away from doing the things I need to do, like work. 

I'm sure at this point you are wondering what is my complaint. Nothing bugs me more than to deal with stupid people. I hate wasting time. I hate being asked to do things that make no sense to me, especially when those things take me away from my responsibilities and cost me more time and money than doing things my way would. So needless to say I was extremely angry and hard to be around by Wednesday. The guy that I have to work with in this program gave me an attitude and it took every ounce of my energy to not snap his neck with my words. 

I made it through the day, and at the end of it, I was so grateful to be home. I managed to get my homework done and turned in on time. I was so worried that I would not be able to get it done and turned in on time. We are not always going to have good days. We are not always going to get along with others. We will be asked to do things that won't make any sense whatsoever because there really are stupid people out there in the world, that don't have the commonsense to make life easy because in the end everyone will get what they want. Regardless of these crappy days, we will make it through. It is after all just another day. God willing another day will come and we will start fresh again. This to shall pass and thank The Lord that those two days passed quickly. 

What days were hard for you to get through? What has someone made you do that you felt was stupid because of the way they wanted you to do it?

Don't Take No For an Answer

A few days ago I wrote about my impending fight with US Bank. I received an email today from the district manager who apologized for the mishap, thanked me for coming to him and agreed that I should not have been passed around. He assured me that all charges would be reversed and they would clear my name. I am very pleased with the results. I told my child when I got the email to always make sure she fight for what's right when someone does something wrong that affects her. 

Later in the day, we were sitting in an office trying to clear up a situation where we were being denied an opportunity because an employee didn't do their job correctly. I have spent months going back and forth climbing the ladder of supervisors to get this situation handled because this would be a great opportunity for us. As we sat in the office speaking to employees and supervisors, they attempted to deny us again. In my continual frustration, I protested that it was not my error and its not my job to do all the calling and running around to correct it. I expressed that I expect them to correct it. They need to do the leg work. That's what they get paid to do. The supervisor didn't look to pleased with me. I looked to my right and saw that my child was in full tear mode. I told her I understood she was upset but needed to settle down. Then I laid into the supervisor again telling her that she needed to go call the other supervisor that sent me to her. I told her we had been in their office all day waiting to fix this problem and now my kid is crying. Make it happen. 

The supervisor took off to get someone to make the call. Three, yes three hours later, the employee and the supervisor came back together and told me they had gone over the situation and found that yes I was correct. It was their error not mine. It was a $800 error to be exact. They told me I needed to return in the morning to fill out some paperwork so they can issue me the $800 the owed me. 

We showed up the next morning and got everything handled and now we are $800 ahead. Now we can catch up on things that we needed to handle. Never take no for an answer when someone makes a mistake and tries to do you wrong. It's more than worth the fight. I know that fighting for what is right is exhausting and very difficult but its necessary. Never give up. Never back down. Unfortunately, in our society, people expect you to back down. They expect you to tell yourself its not worth the fight so that they can screw you. You are always worth the fight. Remember, you are worth the fight for your pride, dignity and sometimes pocket book. Don't let anyone take those things away from you because it will take a little struggle. I could have given in and would have been out of over $1000 in both these situations. I would have been stuck with a bank I can't stand and would have been placed in a bigger financial struggle. Instead, my name will be cleared. I'm up $800 and I'm free to bank wherever I want. You are always worth the fight. 

What do you think? Though fighting for what is right is hard, is it more than worth it to fight? What situation have you been in where you had to fight an uncomfortable fight for what was right? Did you win in the end? Tell your story.